


love you (with everything i have in me)

by brittanyedison



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:57:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24304738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brittanyedison/pseuds/brittanyedison
Summary: “It’s not boring!!” Clary protested. “It’s magical, and beautiful, and interesting, sweeping, it’s--”“You didn’t exactly prove your point. Love remains boring. Magical, beautiful, interesting or sweeping - just crap. Hot love story are far more interesting.”orAU where Clary and Jace are best friends, teaming up to write a story together.
Relationships: Clary Fray/Jace Wayland
Kudos: 17





	love you (with everything i have in me)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is me here with another Clace fic, i hope you love it!  
> I was inspired to do this by a tumblr post, writing about 100 different ways to tell someone "i love you". I got to this post thanks to an amazing fic called "love her today (find one hundred ways)" by breakthesewallsdown & mrsavalance! This fanfic is amazing and i really recommend it! They inspired me to write this.
> 
> I hope you'll love this! kudos and comments are always appreciated:)  
> enjoy <3
> 
> P.S.: Charlie and Emma are characters in the story Clary and Jace are writing!!

**_“One more chapter.”_ **

“You know, we can just get them to fuck.”

Clary drummed on the table with her fingers as she bit the tip of her pencil and then slammed it against the table, frustrated. 

“No, Jace, we can’t just  _ get them to fuck.  _ It’s romance, not... Hot love story.”

Jace was laying on the bed behind her, playing with his pencil and spinning it between his fingers. He rose to sit and then looked at her, “Well, it should be. Romance is boring.”

“It’s not boring!!” Clary protested. “It’s magical, and beautiful, and interesting, sweeping, it’s--”

“You didn’t exactly prove your point. Love remains boring. Magical, beautiful, interesting or sweeping - just crap. Hot love story are far more interesting.”

Clary sighed. She and Jace teamed up to do that assignment, which she thought could be easy. He’s a very close friend of hers, and she knew him well. She knew he reads books, and she knew how deep and creative he could be. But at that moment, when they needed that creativity to finish that one final chapter - all the creativity seemed to have faded away. Jace was all sarcasm and unprofessionalism, and Clary found it incredibly weird. She couldn’t really figure out  **_why_ ** , though. 

“Look, it’s the final chapter. We passed the first meeting, the tension, the bonding, the fight… Now we just have to get them to…”

“Kiss-”

“Fuck.”

“Damn it Jace! I’m serious!” Clary was a bit upset, and in response Jace smiled at her and jumped from the bed.

“I’m serious, too.” He pulled the chair and sat next to her, “So, what’s the plan?”

She sighed and rolled her eyes. “What’s the plan? I don’t know, why won’t you tell me  **what’s the plan?** ”

“Jeez, redhair, calm down.” 

Clary took a deep breath. “For the past hour you’ve done nothing but messing around.”

“I did give you an idea for the opening line.”

“Jace,  _ ‘hey’  _ isn’t really a line.”

“But it’s something.”

Clary looked into his eyes for a moment and he smirked. She turned to the computer and shook her hands. “One more chapter.”

“Yeah!” Jace clapped once, and Clary couldn’t help it but smile.

“Alright, so we did the fight… We gonna get them to make up.” 

“ **Emma** has been acting weird for quite some time, right?”

“Right.”

“And so, when  **Charlie** asks them about it,  **Emma** says it’s nothing.  **Charlie** get pissed off because she never hides anything from he- Are you sure this is how we want this fight?” Jace asked,

“Well, i would be very pissed if i find out someone close to me has been hiding something from me.” Clary said. 

“Yeah, but this is different. Maybe she has personal stuff that she’s not allowed to talk about?”

“But she don’t.”

“Maybe she do?”

Clary sighed. “Then what they could possibly fight about?”

“I say…  **Emma** has feelings for  **Charlie** .”

“Ohh, i’m listening.”

“But  **Charlie** doesn’t know that. So  **Emma** is struggling with telling her, you know. They have been good friends for a while.”

Clary frowned and then started pressing the delete button. It deleted a couple of lines.

“What the hell, Clary?” Jace was confused but she smiled at him, amused.

“I’m rewriting.” She said and turned to the screen. “ **Emma knew for a long time that she has feelings for Charlie. The way that Charlie smiles, or the way that she laughs, how it makes her stomach flip. She had a feeling, that she might be developing feelings for her friend. Accepting it was harder. When she looked into her eyes, when they laid next to each other and she could hear her friend’s breath…** ”

Jace looked at her and listened carefully as she typed and read what she was typing out loud.

“ **She realized. And it confused her. It made her wonder, what’s next… She can’t push the feelings away, she’d explode.** ”

Clary finished typing and turned to look at Jace, who blinked.

“That’s impressive.”

“Jace, this isn’t the first time i’m writing and reading out loud to you.” She grinned, 

“Yeah, but it’s really impressive how…” **_How it’s like you know that i have feelings for you, how you read me._** “How you describe the girl’s feelings.”

She smiled. “Well, thank you very much.”

Jace had feelings for Clary for a very long time. Ever since they bonded in third grade, she became one of his closest friends. Maybe even his best friend. And as much as he hated to admit it, he liked her. A lot.

“Jace?” 

He shook his head, “Yeah, i’m- i’m focused.”

“Do you want a break?” Clary asked softly, but he shook his head again.

“Maybe we can take the laptop and go somewhere outside, to get some air, you know?”

She hesitated but then nodded with a sweet smile. “Sounds cool. We can go to the park!”

“Yeah, the park will be nice.” He said, with the most convincing smile he could get.

“Great, i’ll bring my jacket and we’ll be ready to go.” Clary jumped from her seat and went to bring her jacket, and Jace sighed.

_ Great.  _

-

“Can you close this for a second?”

Jace sat down next to her on their favorite bench as Clary continued to write. 

“Jace, we need to finish this.”

“We still have time.”

“It's due tomorrow.”

“We still have time.” He repeated with a chuckle. It sometimes amused him how stressed Clary can be. She sighed and closed the computer. 

“I’m afraid this way we will never finish.” She took a sip from her coffee and Jace grinned,

“You kidding? You’re one of the most talented writers i know. With you involved, we’ll definitely finish it. ” He said, making Clary smile to him and blush a bit. Then he added, “And with me as your partner...”

“Of course you compliment yourself.” She said with a smirk and he shrugged, “I am amazing.”

“Huh, sure.”

They sat there for a few moments, withouh saying anything. Looking forward at the beautiful view, sitting on their bench, drinking coffee. Just them.

Nothing could change that. 

“I’m really stressed about this date with Sebastian tomorrow-”

**_Except one thing._ **

Sebastian Verlac.

Sure, Jace was attractive and popular, but Clary only saw him as her best friend. Not anything beyond. Therefore, he didn’t think he could have a chance with her.

It still hurt, though.

“Don’t worry,” Jace said “You’ll be fine, he’s gonna love you.”

“Yeah, but we barely talked before.” The girl shrugged and took a sip from her coffee.

“That’s your chance then, you know. Go and dazzle him. You’re Clary Fray, i don’t know a single guy who wouldn’t fall in love with you.”

“Except you, right?” Clary said and grinned, “Because you’re already in love with yourself.”

“Look at me and tell me you can’t find at least one reason to love me. I can already give you one.”

“Oh yeah?”

“I’m incredibly adorable.”

“You sure are.” She squeezed his cheeks and laugh.

Jace never felt like this before. He never liked anyone before the way he liked Clary. 

He always though love is bullshit. That it doesn’t matter, and he never understood why people are so invested in relationships and everything involved. And then he met Clary. And they got closer and closer, and he fell hard for her.

“What about you? Ever since Kaelie i haven’t seen you with anyone else.” Clary said, now looking at him.

**_Because no matter who i dated, they weren’t as good as you._ ** “Maybe dating isn’t for me right now.”

“Come on! You barely even try.” She said and then frowned, “Unless… You’re already seeing someone!!”

**Oh no.** “No i’m no-”

“Tell me tell me tell me!!”

He sighed.

“There’s this one girl i have feelings for for a long time…” 

“Is it someone i know?”

“Nope. I don’t think so.”

“Oh, okay. Then, what’s the problem?”

Jace finished his coffee and put the cup down. “Well, i don’t think she feels the same.”

“Have you tried to talk to her about it?” Clary put the cup in her lap as soon as she finished her coffee too. 

“It’s not that simple, Clary.”

“It can be! You’re just making it more complicated than it actually is. If you’ll never tell her, she’ll never know, and then you just miss your chance, you know?”

Jace was silent for a few moments and then lit up. “Give me your laptop.”

Clary frowned. “Why?”

“Because i have an idea for the final kiss.”

-

_ “Hey.” _

_ Charlie sat there for something that felt like forever. Staring at the view, lost in her thoughts. Lost in her thoughts about her best friend. The fear to lose her. _

_ It was when she heard a voice and turned around to see who was talking to her. The blonde girl sat down next to her when she realized she caught her friend’s attention. _

_ “Hey.” Charlie responded dryly back. Emma tucked a bit of her hair behind her ear shyly. She didn’t know what to say. _

_ “I’m sorry for what i said to you. You know i care about you so much, right?” _

_ Charlie was silent. _

_ “And you’re my best friend. You’re the most important to me.” _

_ Now she turned her head to face her friend. Her green, beautiful eyes. “Then why you’re not talking to me, Emma? I know- I know i might be kinda dramatic right now, but if something is bothering you, i want to know what it is! So i can help you!” _

_ After a few moments of silence, Emma finally said, “I’m afraid this is something you can’t help me with.” _

_ “Well, sure, i can’t help you if i don’t know what it is!” Charlie’s voice shook, and her eyes were full of worry. She was really worried. _

_ “Because i have feelings for you!” Emma snapped. Charlie’s expression changed immediately. She was speechless... _

_ “I knew i should’ve shut my mouth about it...” The blonde murmured and then covered her face with her hands. Charlie hurried to take off her hands from her face and held them gently. _

_ “Why didn’t you tell me?” _

_ “Because i was afraid you don’t feel the same. Or that you’ll hate me.” _

_ “I could never hate you!” Charlie said with a soft voice, causing Emma to look right into her eyes. Her beautiful, brown eyes. “And… I’m really glad you told me.” _

_ “Really?” Emma’s voice was shaking. _

_ “Really. And… If i’m being honest, i feel the same.” _

_ “You do?” _

_ “Emma, you’re the best person i know. You are always there for me, no matter what. You’re kind and beautiful and smart and… And i’m really, really lucky to have you.” _

_ There was silence for a few moments. Charlie was now cupping Emma’s face gently.  _

_ Without thinking, without hesitating, Emma leaned forward and kissed her.  _

_ Charlie didn’t back off. She kissed Emma back softly. They kissed for a few moments before Emma leaned her forward against Charlie’s and closed her eyes.  _

_ They were sitting there for a few moments, when it gotten dark they got up, holding each other’s hand. _

_ - _

Clary was walking next to Jace, holding his umbrella as raindrops fell on it. She loved the rain, the smell of it, the sound of the raindrops falling on anything. 

“I can’t believe we finally finished the story.” She looked up to Jace with a big smile. He, on the other hand, just looked forward and nodded with a smile. Her hands covered his as they held the umbrella together.

“Jace?”

“Hmm?”

“Can you please look at me?”

He turned his head to look at her immediately. Her beautiful, green eyes that he loved so much were looking right into him. 

“I just think what you wrote-”

“We both did.” He corrected her but she shook her head,

“No, you did. I just added lines and words but you were doing the most of this final chapter. I think it was beautiful.”

Jace smiled a little smile. “Thank you.”

She leaned her head against his shoulder, and by the soft looks people that were walking down the streets gave them, Jace thought they probably look like a couple.  **_Oh, if only._ **

“I love how we wrapped their story. Two best friends who fall in love with each other, and then finally confess about their feelings?  **_That’s_ ** the kind of romance i’m a huge sucker for.”

“Oh, so you love reading about a character suffering and struggling with feelings for their friend?”

Clary chuckled. “Of course not. I love to watch them fall in love, slowly, as they bond and they get closer and their relationship gets stronger… And when they finally confess about their love?  **Amazing.** ”

Jace swallowed and didn’t say anything. Clary’s smile faded away and she was looking at her friend, worried.

“Jace,” She stopped walking and stood. Jace stopped walking too, so the umbrella can still cover her. “Can you please talk to me?”

He sighed and turned to face her. He looked so fragile, so gentle.  **_So beautiful._ **

“When i came up with the idea of Emma having feelings for her best friend, it wasn’t out of nowhere.”

“Of course, the story of a person falling in love with their best friend is pretty know-”

“I was talking about myself.”

“What?”

Jace took a deep, shaky breath. “I have feelings for you, Clary Fairchild. I always had, and always will. Because i’m simply, utterly and fully in love with you. And i can’t help it. No matter how hard i try. No matter how much i try to push it away… I can’t. And i know you have a date with Sebastian, i’m not going to stop you, and i’m not finally confessing to you about this because of Sebastian… Because i can’t hold it in any longer. You can… You can forget i said anything, you can go on with your life,  **we** can forget i ever said anything. I will try my hardest to push these feelings away, if that’s what you want. I will. But this whole time we were working together... Laughing with you, working with you, writing with you… I finally understood why i have these feelings. Because you’re you. You’re Clary, and it’s impossible to not fall in love with you. Or at least see what kind of  **good** person you are. Talented, good in everything you do. You’re an amazing artist and writer, and human being. So here i am, standing in front of you, telling you that  _ i love you _ . With everything i have in me.”

**_Silence._ **

She was shocked, speechless. Her eyes sparkled and Jace tried to hold back his tears. 

Jace thought to himself,  **_Why are you crying??_ **

Maybe because he was holding these feelings inside for too long, that when he finally let them out, something in him broke… 

“Jace…” She wiped away his tears gently and then left her hand on his cheek. He leaned into her little hand and closed his eyes. She stroked his cheek with her fingers, her touch so soft.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

He opened his eyes and looked right into hers. “Because i didn’t want to ruin this.”

“You didn’t ruin anything. You could never. We’re  _ Jace and Clary,  _ remember?” Clary said with a soft smile and he nodded, “Nothing could ruin the bond we have. Jace i know you for  **_years_ ** and i can’t believe i was so stupid not to notice this… Not to notice that you feel the same.”

Jace blinked, still looking right into her eyes, shocked by her answer. “W-what…?”

She smiled. “Did you really think all these dates i was going to, all the guys i been with - that any of them could ever compare to you? That any of them could ever be as smart as you… As talented as you… As caring as you…? None of them.”

“Not even Sebastian?”

“Not even close.”

He was smiling a little smile. He closed the umbrella and all the raindrops fell on them. The rain was strong, and got them wet in just a few seconds. Clary just laughed and moved the wet hair from her face.

Jace was smiling too, and then he put the umbrella down, got closer to Clary… Put his hands on her cheek, and asked… “Can i?”

Clary nodded with a big smile when Jace leaned in and kissed Clary. His lips on hers, gentle, soft but passionate kiss of two best friends that kept their feelings inside for too long.

**_The end._ **


End file.
